Thursday, December 30, 2010

Christmas Cards

What to do with all your Christmas cards- I never know what to do with mine so I keep some and some I don't.  Well now I found something special to do with my cards:

I'm going to send them to  

St. Jude's Ranch
St. Jude's Ranch for Children has a 40 year history of healing and caring for abused, abandoned and neglected children. Founded in 1967 by Father Jack Adam, St. Jude’s Ranch for Children opened it’s doors to a single child in need of love and care.

You can mail your donations to:

St. Jude's Ranch for Children
Recycled Card Program
100 St. Jude's Street
Boulder City, NV 89005
877-977-SJRC (7572)

It's a program at the ranch that the children participate in to raise money.  They take the cards apart and make new ones they sell.  You can also purchase cards on their website.
I suggest you keep all the cards with pictures of children on them- who can get rid of those?

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The Fam

My Side

Jesus' Birthday

Rob's Side 

When I see these pictures of my self - I think-
Why didn't I do my hair and make-up?
Why did I stress so much and cause a huge cold sore?
Why didn't I take better care of myself all together?
NO MORE 3 hours of sleep!
AND why didn't I check my Fluff- I can see it is creeping up?
I know no one else sees it, but I do and if I don't soon get a permanent insert for my bra- I'll scream.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Christmas was Great

I am/was so tired!  I'm really needing to take better care of myself as far as eating and exercise.  I struggled right before Christmas with mixed emotions- at times I would be out and so happy I would cry and other times I would just cry.  It's such an emotional time of year and I'm still adjusting to my new life.

Sometimes I freak a little because getting cancer at 40 seems young and well what the heck am I going to be like at 60......or will I see 60.  I've learned at Doorways to Healing that there is good and bad - positive and negative in EVERYTHING!  I've used what I learned to reflect on my situation and YES- 40 is young for cancer- BUT it is also young to experience healing and Jesus.  I did always admire people I would see at church who I knew had either seen or felt something from God.  In the beginning of my being sick - I thought to myself will I ever be that enlightened?  Well it finally did happen for me - many blessings came to me during my treatment and I am so lucky to have gotten them. 
One of my favorite Christmas gifts this year is a book:
Never Give Up
by Joyce Meyer

I admire Joyce and this book speaks of Relentless Determination to Overcome Life's Challenges - which I need!  I love this book because it is motivational AND it includes God through the book.  God is definitely HUGE in my life and to have a book like this is a God sent.  I happened upon this book while shopping with Rob- I have been praying to the Blessed Mother and Jesus to please help me to carry on and do what I'm suppose to do and this book is just what I need to help me.       

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas-
and if you are looking for a Miracle in your life you may want to read Joyce's book

Friday, December 24, 2010

Happy Birthday MOM!

It's my mom's Birthday today!  I love you mom.

I could never never be where I am today with out a great mom like you!  I'm SOOOOOOO grateful.

I could never repay you for all you have given me always.

Birthday 2009
I wish you the best birthday ever and this coming year to be filled with happy times!  Like the commercial says, "No More Tears".

I love you mom

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Thank you God and everyone who prayed!

Blood test back and it was fine.

No big problems just showing I'm anemic- so maybe some blood studies.  I have been really tired lately and one morning this week mom found me asleep in my car.  YiKes

I am thrilled about my blood test- but I have to say it was torture waiting and it got worse when I knew they had the results, but hadn't read them yet.  I didn't think I could stand it....thought about taking a pill, but instead I prayed, cried, prayed more!  By the time I found out I was wore out from all the worry- totally drained!  Oh and I'll be sporting a coldsore for Christmas thanks to stressing so much!   My mom was with me when I got my results and I just cried and she hugged me till I stopped.
We always need our mom!

God heard and answered the prayers!  St. Theresa has been there for me every time I ask her.

I'm grateful to everyone who prays for me.  I know I was healed and blessed because of everyone praying for me.  I LOVE YOU so much!  Now I have to serve my Lord and maybe teach others of the power and love of God and his people.

Happy New Year!

I'm gonna be as skinny at the 11 in 2011!  At least I'm really going to try HARDER!

So here is some eYecAndY  to keep me motivated:

When I get down to 127
I buying a Hard Tail outfit!

What I'm listening to to keep me going:

I'm always drawn to big guys rapping!  Don't know why- they just make me feel 
oh gee- they curse and stuff but they do kick butt
make sure to pause my music at the bottom if you watch these  

I've learned at the gym that watching music videos on my ipod while on the stepper or treadmill keeps me motivated and yes Fergie is one of my fav hot bods!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

What's going through my mind?

Should I wear something on my head Christmas Eve night?

Love this

Next years theme???

I want her hair- color and all! 

Must lose weight

Oh Honey the Keys to Our New House
Inside Joke

Hells Angels Chick- LOVE IT!  LOVE IT!
Vintage LIFE
I wanna be this tough

Oh to be walking down this street

Yeah maybe I will wear something on my head
Inspired by my new favorite blog
Check out her post on 5 different ways to wear this hat

It's gonna be a Merry Christmas....Do a little dance!

I've been getting back to my prayers lately and I don't pray for myself as much lately as I pray for others.  I am so Happy to have gotten good news from about 4 fellow cancer cuties!  Lesions gone, chemo working, blood test good and the icing on my cake came this evening when I read Carsinista's post - WOW!  Last night before I went to bed I was crying for her and looked out the window to the sky and asked God if he could please help her.  Well I wasn't the only one....and well no pee bag for her and her kidney is functioning normal!
I love this blog because Sara is so honest and her husband is the sweetest guy ever (Mr. Wonderful).

I'm so happy- these couple days have left me not so wrapped up in my own blood test!

It's almost Christmas and I'm loving so much of it right now!  I hope Lucas has a great Christmas- I'm really looking forward to spending time with him and NO SCHOOL!

Here's how fast Christmas seems to go

I did manage to make the Salt Scrub and gave one to my Dear Friend Tammy!

Hey and the tree is finally up!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

My Breast Cancer Tips

Because I've met a couple new girls I am re posting this today- to make it easy for them.
 I think it is better put together than before
Please pray for the newly diagnosed

Me in my favorite wig from
Paradise Wigs on Clinton Street in Binghamton NY
also bought wigs from

So here are my tips just in case there is someone out there in need- I'll add to it as I go along.....

As soon as we found out we called our priest, and started calling anyone and everyone we knew who had any information on breast cancer, friends, family, doctors ans so on.

My priest gave me the sacrament of Anointing of the Sick and Forgave me of all my sins- This was definitely the start of me letting go of anything bad in my life and start the spiritual healing journey which was KEY for me!

I started a notebook at the time of my diagnosis that in the beginning included all my doctor info as well as appointments, directions, cancer info and so on. In the back of my notebook I started my list of survivors, nurses- i knew and could ask questions, breast cancer experts and other breast cancer patience's addresses and phone numbers.

Remember to include pages for tips and also a page of important quotes you hear from people. It helped me to read and say a loud inspiring things people told me.

I also started a prayer packet which included scriptures I would receive from healing masses and people in general. I collected prayer cards an cards that were just plain great to read over and over again. I also had my priest number with me at all times because no matter what he would be there and remind of God. I prayed every morning and night and anytime I felt sick with fear and doubt.

I also carried with me a special little case which included a chaplet (St. Theresa prayer beads) a cross Rob made me and a guardian angle. So whenever I went to an appointment and found myself alone (which no matter how much family and friends you have you end up somewhere sitting, laying, standing alone) waiting for a test of something I could pull out my beads and pray or just plain hold my cross.

Other things like books, articles, websites, prayer:

I linked to as many things as I could for more info-anything in grey is a link to that item.  Just click on the grey words and it will take you there. 

Information concerning women and hormones:
A couple of things I would read about if you don't have breast cancer.....concerning hormone balance

What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Breast Cancer- Dr. John R Lee, MD

Breast Cancer or Not - A Woman Owned Company with a lot of Information for women- Emerita
Products for PMS- Menopause- Hormone stuff- some of which I can not have due to my cancer being hormonal- Estrogen Positive.

Ok the stuff that helped me with my cancer and now helps me to heal myself.............


Kris Carr- inspirational (stage4) cancer survivor with a book, DVD, and Blog- I love all of them.

Healing Power of Pilates Article- Good for Bone Density

Weight Gain During Chemo Article

In Sickness and In Health- article for married couples dealing with diagnosis.

Weak Body Strong Bond- an inspiring article from a couple dealing with chronic illness. This couples love will blow you away. Thinking about them got me through more than a couple hard days.

My Journey through Breast Cancer by Pin Cevallos-Schnabel- this beautiful Surgeon talks about her journey
This was sent to me early on by my Best Friend Leann- huge help to me!


I was so lucky to be a patient at Sloan Kettering in NY- I honestly don't know how I could have gone anywhere else.  It is one of the top Hospitals in the world for Breast Cancer- there were people from all over the world and all different ages.
All the breast cancer Patient Information Booklet at Sloan Kettering
they have great patient booklets on caring for yourself during treatment, surgery, and so on.
Sloan Kettering Website has a lot of information on Breast Cancer and not the least bit scary. Don't forget they have a section that will tell you about herbs interacting with your treatment.

Herb listings and information- check any herbs you are using Awesome woman forums to help you along the way for support and they always have the lastest Breast Cancer update- on their 1st page.

American Cancer Society Complimentary and Alternative Medicine

National Center for Complimentary and Alternative Medicine

Dr. Susan Love's Website- love it!- this website is great- it can answer a lot of questions and has sections
for the different types of breast cancer- super easy.

No Surrender Breast Cancer Foundations (founded by Gina—triple negative survivor)

CURE today website- you can get their magazine as well.

Dr. Wayne Dyer- wonderful man....I need to get one of his books- his website is wonderful.

Products for Breast Cancer Girls especially us mastectomy girls- Amoena
God Bless this Company!

LOOK GOOD FEEL BETTER- Tips on wigs and make-up during treatment. You can also sign up for a class in your area.

The National Lymphedema Network - For Lymphedema- Lastest news

Myers Center- Massage & Lymphedema- Alana McKercher Myers is a wonderful practioner and educator of all things Lymphedema related!  Wonderful
Crazy Sexy Life- Kris Carr's website- She is living with Stage 4- untreatable cancer.
My Crazy Sexy Life- a holistic network of great people

Society of the Little Flower- this is where you can learn about St. Therese and purchase mass cards and other items of St. Therese items. They have the Chaplet I used at my appointments.

Eat Organic- check out Environmental Working Groups list of the least pesticide fruits/veggies- so if you can't buy organic- these are safer than others.

BOOKS / I bought some in CDS for in the car

Anti-Cancer- David Servan-Schreiber

The China Study- T. Colin Campbell, Thomas M Campbell II, Howard Lyman and John Robbins

Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips- Kris Carr

The Only Answer to Cancer- Dr. Leonard Coldwell

The Power of Positive Thinking- Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

Story of a Soul- Autobiography of St. Therese of Lisieux- she is the greatest saint of modern times.

Intimacy after Breast Cancer- Gina M. Maisano (triple negative survivor)

Getting Well Again- Carl Simonton

Breaking the Food Seduction – Neal Barnard

Daily Word for Women- Zuck, Wright, and Meyer

Chemotherapy Survival Guide- McKay and Schacher- a MUST READ before Chemo

The Cancer Lifeline Cookbook- Marthai and Smith

The Cancer Fighting Kitchen- Rebecca Katz
CLEAN- Alejandro Junger MD

The PH Miracle- Robert Young Phd. and Sheley Redford Young

Catholic Book of Prayers- this is great if you are Catholic - it has all the prayers, mysteries, stations of the cross, mass information.

Staying Abreast- a book with exercises for breast surgery patients- also includes information on lymphedema (this is something women like me have to watch for-our lymph nodes were taken out of our arm so we need to take precautions)

Remember the following books are old, but I enjoyed reading them- Dr. Ann Wigmore does have more books and she does have an energy soup that wasn't yet around at the time of Eydie Mae's journey.

How I Conquered Cancer Naturally- a woman's journey through breast cancer
by Eydie Mae

Be Your Own Doctor- A positive guide to natural living
by Ann Wigmore

Audio Books

Getting Ready by Dr. Bernie Siegel- helps you prepare for surgery or treatment. Dr. Siegel has many wonderful books.

I also purchase the Power of Positive Thinking for my Car and also the China Study- because sometimes that's the only time I have free to get a book down is driving!


Kris Carr's Documentary


Stress Relief Through Guided Imagery- Martin L. Rossman, MD- I used this right from the start to deal with stress- LOVE IT.

Ison Pain Management System - David Ison- I used this in the hospital the night after my mastectomy for help with pain (which wasn't really bad).


The Doctor- if you have cancer experience you will relate- great movie!

Doorways to Healing- This helped me more than just about anything! Healing emotionally from cancer was hard for me and this helped me so much.
I fear this organization will be out of funds and out of business as it is a not for profit.  If you can you should really try to go.  Nothing will do what this does- it's a weekend- a free and it is the most amazing healing.

Doorways To Healing
4 Coleman Ave
Elmira, NY 14905 tel 607 734-1751
Meredith Whitney – Pres/CEO
Provides educational workshops
I have attended the 1st Workshop and the Couples with Rob and it helped us so much as a couple!
Breast Cancer.Org

Network of Strength- 1-800-221-2141
You can talk to a survivor- I called them when I was going for a 2nd opinion for radiation and they helped me come up with some questions and sent me info on radiation.

Great People- Reach for Recovery- I signed up and was matched up with someone similar to my situation, this person can also give you a ton of information on the American Cancer Society and what they can do to help you.


Prayer has played an enormous role in my fight and recovery- so many have prayed for me and I love Prayer as I was granted many blessings along my journey.

My Favorite Healing Prayer:

I believe this was written by Father Hess in Pennsylvania

Heavenly Father

Heavenly Father, I call on you right now in a special way. It is through your power that I was created. Every breath I take, every morning I wake, and every moment of every hour, I live under your power.

Father, I ask you now to touch me with that same power. For if you created me from nothing,you can certainly recreate me. Fill me with the healing power of your spirit. Cast out anything that should not be in me. Mend what is broken. Root out any unproductive cells. Open any blocked arteries or veins and rebuild any damaged areas. Remove all inflammation and cleanse any infection.

Let warmth of your healing love pass through my body to make new any unhealthy areas so that my body will function the way you created it to function.

And Father, restore me to full health in mind and body so that I may serve you the rest of my life.

I ask this through Christ our Lord.


Attending healing mass also helped me. My church has one every week and another church has one once a month. Healing masses are good because they teach you how to deal with pain and suffering. Anyone can attend a healing mass. The priest will have experience with pain and suffering and it will be comforting- to see there are others out there dealing with pain.

For women taking Tamoxifen
Also no Grapefruit!

Radiation Stuff CLICK HERE

Reconstruction Stuff CLICK HERE
I wish I was better about organizing my Reconstruction info- you will have to click on my blog the label reconstruction and it will give you all posts that include talk of my reconstruction. It starts with the newest post and goes back unless you click on SHOW OLDER POSTS
I will say this- I have 1 breast removed and a tissue expander inserted to inflation of 600ccs
I had my implant put in after chemo- before radiation
I have the The Natrelle 410  implant also know as the Gummie Bear  which you can only get in certain hospitals because it's brand new and I'm in a trial.  It has been used for years in Europe.
I will have a nipple constructed with what I have (no skin graft) and then I will have my nipple tattooed for color.
Tissue expander were VERY uncomfortable for me and my Gummie Bear so comfortable- I think anything would be better than the expander.
And my good breast.....had to be reduced and that was nice - I loved that they did a pathology on it and everything was good.
No my breasts don't match- with clothes on no one knows and I have cleavage- I am happy I kept my breast- I wasn't ready to give all my girly stuff away yet.
My implant will have to be replaced in 10 years.

List of my doctors CLICK HERE

My list of supplements CLICK HERE

I know I've included a bunch of information-
If I had to choose only a couple of things to take on a Deserted Island- It would be:

My Crucifix and Bible, Healing Prayer, and St. Theresa Chaplet Case
AntiCancer Book
The Story of a Soul Book
The Power of Positive Thinking
Ipod with my Stress Relief through Guided Imagery and Christian Music along with Dance Music!
Father Caruso and Father G.- HEALERS of Faith and Health
Dr. Meredith Whitney (Emotional Healer)  and Dr. Monica Morrow (Surgeon)

I will try and get all tips on this one post. Meaning I will keep adding/updating it.

Monday, December 20, 2010


It's so nice to receive packages- and it's even more fun to send them- I'm trying to be as creative as some other people! 

This package arrived from family friend in England

I love this Harrods box and I think it will be perfect to store all my Christmas jewerly in

I just love his adorable face!

This package I tore all apart and put the shirt on almost immediately.
Oh the wonderful breast cancer items
Betty's Blessings continue to come through.........I recieved this package from her wonderful daughter.

Nancy sent me these pictures and I love seeing Betty and Earl together.
Also the pictures of the pink tree are so meaningful because when I went to see Betty for the 1st time she was so proud of Nancy and all she does with breast cancer.
I sat in her kitchen and she showed me pictures of the pink tree with her name on it.
Now Nancy has sent me my own set of pictures and there was my name- it was so touching to me.  

And sometimes you get a package and you don't even realize it's a package.
My mother in law has an artist friend and she gave this to me- well it came way of Rob
I thought it was pretty and I thought gee I wonder if I can hang it on my tree and I wondered about the design.  One day I finally asked my mother in law about it and I got the real story! 
It's "Bottles of Hope"    
Read about them HERE
It opens- I had no idea
AND there is a little note inside
It reads:
This Bottle of Hope
made just for you
Holds wishes
and Love
Your Dreams come true

I was so honored to receive one made just for me especially after the whole store of the bottles- originally made by a cancer patient who put to good use Heparin (medicine) bottles.

My girlfriend Leann is just the best at writing and mailing out notes- letters- gifts.
How pretty is this package? 

Also inside was my water bottle I left at her house a few months ago. 
I went to open it to put it away    


A secret message.....oh she writes the best letters this one talked about my Sweet Sixteen party and how she felt like she one the best friend lottery.
I will never use this bottle again
I'm keeping it just the way it came with the note inside
I've got a couple packages of my own going out....a little late
I wish I was more on the ball like the wonderful people who sent me packages, but I am trying!

Friday, December 17, 2010

Well no results for at least a week.

Rob and I years from now

I had an absolute horrible day yesterday!  We got a late start and never made it to my appointment because when I called to say we were stuck in traffic in PA they informed me that Dr. Seidman had to leave early due to a family emergency.  As I sat pulled over on the side of the highway and the nurse was telling me I had to reschedule I lost it.  I handed the phone to Rob and just felt like I wanted to explode!

I dreaded this blood test and now I have to have it hang over my head all through Christmas when I mentally prepared myself for results by Friday - Monday at the lastest.

 Rob insisted I get the blood test here and then Dr. Seidman's nurse can read it for me- Yeah!  I went today and had the blood drawn and they told me it takes a week for results of one of the 3 tests they are running.....Which one I ask.......Oh just the CA 15-3 better know as Cancer Antigen 15-3- the most important ONE!  UGH.  What is wrong with me I'm now totally upset again!

OK- I did get a hold of myself and I'm trying really hard to get into Christmas, but I'm totally not digging it at the moment.  Not nice of me- I know.

So when I went to the office for my blood work there was a huge line and so many of the people are up in age!  It can be so depressing, but at this point in my life I LOVE old people!  As I was getting ready to pray I seen this little old lady who may have well been Santa Claus - that is how happy she made me feel.  She was wearing the cutest beret and had a little snowman on her coat.  She had a walker and moved so slow and she was inspiring to me.  She got up this morning and put that cute beret on- WOW.  I myself didn't even want to get up this morning!  I was hoping she would look at me because I actually do look for the face of God in people I see- SO I STARED AT HER.  How bad is that, but I thought if she looks at me I may see God and he will see me.?...  I prayed to myself and just stared and finally as she was taking off her coat she looked at me and gave me a big smile.  Oh the joy- it felt good.  As she took her coat off I could see she was wearing the most beautiful gold pendant of the Blessed Mother

- WOW.   I was so happy - I complemented her on her pin and she continued to sit down and read her book.  I too wear my pendants always unless I need to wear something that calls for a different necklace and then I feel horrible about it.  That rarely happens.  I wear mine because like her I am devoted to my belief that God is with me and my medals confirm that.  In that sense I feel like an old person-my medals are so important too.   As I was watching all these old people coming and going I thought to myself-  Oh how I remember thinking I never want to get old and now I look at these creatures and I love them.  They know something that I don't because they lived a lot more than me.  They are so strong and as I watched the old guy sleeping in his chair,  the guy making jokes as he stood there with his IV in hand, the little lady with the snowman pin, the little lady with 1 arm, the ones walking with canes I thought "I can't wait to get old"!  They have something special about them that I want.  They are just trucking along doing what they want with no fear they aren't bothered by the small stuff, but they actually enjoy the small stuff.  And some of them just look like really tough bad a$$e$- even the little old ladies - have it in them- if it comes down to a fight they'll kick butt.

I hate calling them old......we need another WORD something that says STRONG, DETERMINED, NO NONSENSE,  PEACE and LOVE.  How about wow he was so WISE or Gee she is so RESPECTED.  OK I'm babbling.

Tell me these guys aren't some of the toughest around 

What Arnold may not know is that these women are a lot stronger then even him

See what I mean  

Yep their old but don't know it!
and don't much care

Love this lady 
I don't think anyone is going to tell her anything
Not at her age
Yeah Right

I'm getting better and I just may get stronger through this holiday of eagerly awaiting my results.

I was so SUPER excited to receive an invitation to my pastor's open house- I LoVe his open house!

This weekend we have a Christmas party with some fun friends - Rob and I look forward to it all year.  We eagerly awaited that invitation as well.

I need to get busy on my Christmas cards- We are receiving some great cards!