Hug a Soldier

Well I had what was my 1st outing after treatment and I was really excited- sort of.   I knew if I went I could wear sunglasses and chances are no one would know it was me. I was right.  It was nice to walk around and just look at people.  I did stop and talk to 1 or 2 people.  My friend's little girl said to me "Who are you?" and it was sort of funny.  It does bother me that I look so different, but more than that I feel different.  It's harder than you think to just start where you left off and I don't think you can.  After walking around and seeing everyone walking around and having a good time I wanted to cry.  I felt like they were so beyond me- I felt like I didn't fit.  At times I am so happy to tell people I'm done and other times I feel lost.  It's like I've been somewhere that no one knows about.  I say to people I feel like I've been through the war.

All these emotions made me think of people who actually do go to war.  I was reminded of all the soldiers who have lost their limbs and come home with a smile on their face.  This makes me ashamed for crying over a mastectomy.  When I was at my low the 1 and only thing besides prayer that I could think of that would make me feel good was a hug.  No talking just a hug!  Thank God I come from a family that does hug because it helped me a lot.  Many times I would just fall into Rob's arms and let go.  I would enjoy every strong hug from my father like I was fueling up.  I would find comfort in my mom's hugs.  I felt such love from my bro when he would bend down to hug me.  Lucas- well his are the sweetest of all.  Hugs are just an amazing thing and strangely enough I keep hearing and seeing hugs.

So I was thinking about soldiers and all they go through when they are off to war and away from their life.  How hard it must be for them to switch back and become what they once where when in fact maybe they can't.  I have huge respect for anyone serving our country in the service.  When I'm feeling sorry for myself I quickly think of them.

Today on Facebook when I seen this video I couldn't stop crying.  Those amazing people go through so much and then they come home and I'm sure they at times feel lost...... It makes me want to hug everyone of them.

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